enemy of the state
one man's conspiracy is another man's business plan
Wednesday, June 29, 2005 | The current mood of DuctapeFatwa
Natalee Missing in Summer of Sharks

When has America seen such a summer as this?

A damsel in distress mystery furls and twists and bubbles in the tropical heat, sharks feast on young tender flesh, young tender whispers, young tender screams.

FoxNews, America's chosen Emissary of Airwaves, goes to DefCon Five, with THROB! NEWS! ALERTS! every five minutes. THROB! Another shark attack! Standing by for press conference! THROB! Flowers are delivered to the Van der Sloot home! Stay tuned.

When has America seen such a summer as this?

Al Gore's internets are on fire! They are mounting the Orisha over on the Natalee blogs, gunning for Operation Aruban Freedom, the Liberation of the Netherlands, spread some democracy on the Hague, give those Alabama good old boys a crack at showing Joran a lil' bit o' old fashioned Ghraib, he'll break.

Another mysterious disappearance, or two, a corpse adorned with a Colombian necktie, far-reaching Twitty business tentacles, some running a bit afoul of the SEC, reports of a maid who saw - well, never mind, all coincidental tinfoil hat conspiracy theories. No need for evidence, we know he's guilty, Bush repeated after his earpiece, referring to a slightly tatty old CIA asset, a man who used to work for Daddy, and another daddy, another octopus? and who used to work for him?

Don't ask, don't go there. Don't go to Teheran, don't go to Caracas. Mother's tears, electrodes and cream, shark-ripped flesh, party boat DJ, O Legba!

When has America seen such a summer as this?

The heat, you can feel it building, thick, shimmering, moist buzzing heat, sweat pours down foreheads, onto the table, wipe it off, make a speech, the Father comforts his sticky children, America will impose its will, blood is sticky too, the Dutch are the most brutal, said the Spaniards, back in the day when they were just punk kids scuffling over colonial spoils, yes there was a scuffle, the hot-headed young stepcousin, the callow young Dutch boy, over the blonde beauty? or cards?

When has America seen such a summer as this?

A shark took her arm, but she keeps on surfing, buoyed by her own line of fragrances. Blood in the water, dogs in the water, forty dollar Rainbow sandals, Iya Ye Kuma Kue Yu Mau! Joran's poor bleeding tongue indeed.

When has America seen such a summer as this?

It is hot in Caracas, hot in Teheran, smoldering in Damascus, Aruba, shout the blogs, is an extra island. The Americans can buy Joran's thumbs for $200. America can destroy the whole island, the whole region, several regions, the world, with one submarine. They will burn down the houses of their enemies, and their enemies are legion.

When has America seen such a summer as this?

Yards of beer, bull sharks of fear, Yemaya, Yemaya, sacame lo malo y llevalo al mar...

When has America seen such a summer as this?

Nothing to do but wait for news, wait for sharks, wait for September...

posted at 1:00 AM

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testimonials
Actions like Sep 11 do not happen in a vaccuum. Long before those hijackers ever stepped foot on the planes the damage had been done. They were brainwashed with the same type of garbage propaganda that is spewed from Fatwa's weblog.
RedTard
blogcritics.org
Middle Eastern countries are so much more barbaric today and preAmercia than America can ever hope to be...America has only been around 230 years...who did you blame for everything before that Ductape? I am calling a Fatwa on your bullshit!
Militarytracy
boomantribune.com
IMO - terrorist plain and simple. He is an Al queda operative who should be put in a cage on gitmo
Skinner
conservativeunderground.com
My favorite..."In Defense of Holocaust Deniers"
drdon326
democraticunderground.com
I always thought that "The Enemy Within" was just a metaphore for liberalism, that is, until I encountered Ductape Fatwa. He should be in an orange jumpsuit for sure.
limewireayane
peopleforchange.net
ductape is either a commie, al queda, or a deep cover mole
windansea
conservativeunderground.com
Tells you something about this asshole doesn't it. He's really serious.
GabysPoppy
conservativeunderground.com
I believe that DF is nothing but a Republican plant...
SallyCat
boomantribune.com
Ductape is a commie, a terrorist, and he drinks blood too. He drinks Capitalist blood. He eats unborn babies too
J97
conservativeunderground.com
Give me your address and I'll send you $20 and a thank-you note for taking your hatred elsewhere.
redwagon
boomantribune.com
A terrorist with a sense of humor!
Nephilim
conservativeunderground.com
He ain't nuthin' but shit
Jim Sagle
democraticunderground.com

inadequate, halfway house bullshit
Arthur Gilroy
boomantribune.com
You are a dumbass. Fuck you and your condescension about us "benighted sheeple."
hamletta
dailykos.com
Untruthful, damaging bullshit
John Locke
democraticunderground.com
no better than the neocons and no different than Timothy McVeigh space
dailykos.com
a turd in the punchbowl...if DF were Joe Hill he probably would have killed himself rather than get put to death.
nothingshocksmeanymore
democraticunderground.com
A compost pile of fecundity
Feanor
dailykos.com
despicable and literally mentally ill
Addison
dailykos.com